For years, I had dreamt of writing a blog. The timing just never seemed right. Something always stood in my way. I even signed up for a blogging course but never attended.
And then eventually I just did it. I committed to writing a weekly blog about the intersection between money and life.
It has been one of the best decisions of my life.
The quote by American novelist Flannery O’Connor, ‘I write to discover what I know' resonates.
This blog has been my way of making sense of the world. As an introvert, I like to figure out the world by myself initially. But then, I love to share and engage with others about those discoveries and thoughts. The blog has allowed me to do both. I do a lot of my figuring out through the exercise of writing. Writing has forced me to crystalise and engage with what I think and to work through what can often be loose thoughts. And sharing those views has become an important part of my journey.
It has been a way of connecting to people (a small, but significant thing during Covid especially). Readers from all over the world have given me feedback and shared their perspectives and stories with me. What has been most interesting about the feedback is seeing what people enjoy but also what challenges and stirs. Namely, the stories. It is the stories that hook people and provoke the most response. It is perhaps not surprising. Stories are how we make sense of our world. We make meaning through our stories - it is how we survive. It is something we must continue to do. Because more than ever we need to make sense of our world.
I was again challenged this week to try and find meaning after the premature death of a vibrant, strong woman living a beautiful life. It just didn’t make sense. At our last meeting, we discussed the plans for her future now that she had an empty nest. As the matriarch of her family, she had steered her extended family through many difficulties and hardships. She was looking forward to the years ahead; to being able to review the purpose and meaning of her life. She never had the chance for any of those dreams to materialise. She died far too young.
Her story and the abrupt ending of it spurred me to look at some of my own dreams. Especially the unfulfilled dreams I still have. Many of these dreams have been on my dream list for years, even decades, and have been waiting for a date in the future when I will have more time. But as my client’s story reminded me, we are not all guaranteed that time.
I have been challenged to be honest about my timelines and justifications. Confronting that made me realise that it was probably fear that kept me from blogging. Fear of the commitment and the feedback. Fear of failure. And fear is probably contributing to the procrastination of other important dreams too. Her story helped me unpack the meaning around my unmet dreams – and understand the role that procrastination and fear played.
Fear often stands in the way of the best things in our lives. The more fear, the more likely it is that there is something important to be done. Some important internal hurdle to overcome. Overcome it and you get to the reward on the other side. A reward that will contribute to the meaning or purpose of your life.
So here I am celebrating 100 blogs. I’m so grateful that I had the guts to pursue this dream. That I stepped past my fear. I hope that through my stories you will be reminded of your many dreams and pursue them with renewed vigour and passion.
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//19 November 2021